The "How-To" for Wedding Invitations

Send your invitations 6 to 8 weeks prior to the wedding date.

Select a wedding invitation that reflects you both as a couple, and reflects the theme, tone and style of your wedding.

Don't forget to include the basics:
     Names
     Date
     Time
     Location & Address
     Reply information
     Consider adding a tip regarding the dress code:
            "black tie optional", "casual", “wear lawn-friendly shoes”, “under the trees”, etc.

Use names when possible- it is more hospitable to use specific names instead of "and guest."

Use correct titles: Reverend, Honorable, Captain, etc. It is flattering when invitations are addressed correctly. When in doubt, do a Google search!

Use a standby guest list CAREFULLY. 10-20% percent of invited guests typically send regrets. (However – I have known weddings where all guests attended – be cautious!)

Always address wedding invitation envelopes by hand.

 Do not use abbreviations. Spell out words such as Road, Street, Pennsylvania, four o’clock in the afternoon or Two-Thousand-Eleven.

It is improper to use the phrase "No Children Allowed". Instead - opt for "Adult-only..."

Gift Registry

It is impolite to include gift registry information in your invitations. (According to traditional American etiquette, wedding gifts are purely optional.) It is best to place this information on your wedding website, or advise family & friends to spread the information via word of mouth. 

Wedding Invitation Insert Cards

Reception Cards

• A must if your ceremony & reception are in different locations.
• Specifies the location and time of the reception celebration.
• Consider including:

• Address

• Time

• Directions &/or Map

• Cocktail Hour Information

Accommodations Card

• Very important for destination weddings....extremely helpful for local weddings with out-of-town guests.
• Consider including: airports, hotel options, area attractions & rental car agencies.

• Look at adding places for coffee, dry cleaning, breakfast or "ways to kill time"

• Include the details for booking reserved accommodations: your hotel can provide the necessary details.
•  If you want to avoid this enclosure all together, add the information to your wedding website. Guests who are not online should be contacted directly. 
• To conserve space and make life easy on your guests - consider combining your Accommodations info with your Directions insert...either on the same sheet or double sided. 

Directions & Maps

• Including Directions and a map in your invitation is optional - 
• Regardless of how much you put in your invite - having the maximum amount of info possible on your wedding website can answer any and all questions your guests may have.  
• Including photocopied maps takes away from the effort you have put into the perfect invitation. Consider hand drawing a small map, or asking an artistic friend for help. Check & double check your facts before having them printed.
• For a fun map - use this website: http://www.weddingmapper.com/

RSVP

• NUMBER YOUR RSVPS! It is very common for guests to forget to write their name on their RSVP's. Make sure you use an pencil or invisible marker to label the inserts...this way...when one comes back without a name you can identify the sender. 
• Postcard vs. Envelope 

• Postcard stamps are less expensive

• Envelopes are more formal

• Set your RSVP date according to your venue/caterer

• Make sure to leave enough time to make phone call to guests who did not respond

• Make sure you have enough time to create a seating chart - doing this is a rush is not ideal

• A return address is optional on your RSVP, seeing as you know the address is correct (however - something could smug the writing in transit causing the RSVP not to arrive)

Addressing Your Wedding Invitations

• Double check the names on your guest list before the envelopes are addressed, to be sure they are spelled correctly.

• Invitations are always addressed to both members of a married couple.

• An invitation to an unmarried couple residing at the same address should be addressed with both names on a single line.

• No abbreviations or initials are used when addressing. 

• If children are invited but are not receiving a separate invitation, their names may be written on a line below their parents’ names. 

• The couple should also carefully consider where they want their RSVP’s sent.

• Unless a response card is included, responses and gifts are likely to be sent to the return address on the outer envelope.

Thank You Notes

Send within 3 months of the receipt of the gift.

Bridal shower thank-you notes should be sent within two weeks of the event.

Start sending thank-you notes as soon as the gifts start arriving, even if it is before the wedding. This will help control the number which needs to be written after the wedding.

Consider setting a goal to write a certain number of thank-you cards per day.

In an effort to speed up response time, brides and grooms often order thank-you cards with their wedding invitations. This offers couples a cleaner, more cohesive look.

In the thank-you:
          Greet the guest
          Express gratitude for attending
          Let them know you were thinking of them if they did not attend
          Reference the gift specifically

Check and re-check ensuring you are matching guests with the correct gift. Guarantee accuracy - write the thank-you as you open each gift.

For monetary gifts - thank them for their generosity without mentioning a specific amount. Consider referencing what the gift will be put towards.

Always send bridal shower thank-you notes separate from wedding notes, even if they are to the same person.

It is not necessary to write a thank-you note to your vendors, however, all vendors appreciate acknowledgement for a job well done. Vendors truly value public testimonials – most would be thrilled to have you publicize your thoughts via their website or social media.

Do not hesitate to ask your new husband to pick up a pen & help!

It is never acceptable to send a pre-printed thank-you note - a handwritten, personal message, including a reference to their gift, is proper.  Photos are nice mementos, however, make arrangements with your photographer to get an image quickly in order to print & send out your thank-you’s within a reasonable time frame.

Regardless of whether or not a gift was given, anyone who attended your wedding should receive a thank-you note. Especially for those who traveled to attend, their presence should be considered your gift. You can never be too gracious!

RSVP Card: etiquette & text ideas

Make sure to include: 

•           A space for your wedding guests to write in their name(s)
•           A reply-by date
•           Include meal choices, if necessary
•           Line of guests to indicate whether or not they will be attending
•           Fill in the blank for # attending 

Consider your style: a postcard with stamp, card with envelop & stamp or online RSVP. 

If tangible cards are used, mark the back of each card with an identifying number in case guests neglect to write in their names. Using this method, you will be able to figure out who the reply card is from. 

Pre-address & stamp tangible cards to make replying as easy as possible.

Include the necessary information if you are open to accepting responses via email or telephone. 

Do not include events that not everyone is invited to (for example - rehearsal dinner, celebratory breakfasts & planned outings.)